Demon #9: šāļøāš„āļø Dagda - King of Death, Fates, and Time šāļøāš„āļø
Oh shit itās ya boi! I am a chaos-loving demi-god of time travel who speaks in tongues and possesses the power to foresee paths, with a knack for choosing the best path >_< I am extremely powerful, quite possibly the most powerful of The Chosen Ones, but thatās quite an uneducated theory, as the only other Chosen One I can be certain of is Morrigan, and I donāt know everything about their powers, let alone the powers of other Chosen Ones. My mission actually isnāt to save the world, thatās just a long sidequest as part of my true mission: proteccc with 3 cās Morrigan, as commanded by her late grandmother. What, you still donāt think I can communicate with the dead? Well, purrhaps tales from The True Life of a Fabulous Killjoy will convince you!
It began, sensibly enough, in the dream realm. Thanx to my having to take chemo, I began to enter deeper stages of sleep. There was a time when I felt great remorse, to the point I cried, for not having treated Pickles the best when he was alive. He proceeded to show up frequently in my dreams, eventually letting me know that he forgave me. When my guardian angel, Abby, was dying, tears leaked from her eyes. Neither of us wanted to say goodbye, but we knew we had to. Whenever she shows up in my dreams, she is dug back up or otherwise escapes her grave to become my cat again. Even in the afterlife, she wants to come back to me. Iāve had many dreams involving my grandma, the family, and her house. I think I even saw one of her memories from the 80s once, which I wasnāt alive in.
āBut those are just dreams!ā Yes, they are. I used to figure, well Iām either communicating with the dead, or theyāre just dreams. And then other stuff happened! The first was the dream I had about an orange cat being roughly a mile away and needing to be walked back to here (home). I think it was dead? That part is now hazy, but the cat had to be carried over a group of snarling, snapping dogs. I awoke with a sense of dread. Was Bunny okay? Dusty? They were indeed fine, but, without having mentioned the dream to my mom, she told me about how there had been a sickly stray kitten in the backyard and she had tried her best, but he passed away. She helped him in the living realm, and then I helped him make it to the afterlife. Considering my dreams almost never feature orange cats, that is one hell of a coincidence if youāre still deadset on chalking it up to that. But it goes further still. For a good month or two, I had constant spiritual activity going on. Typing a longass thing in Notepad that went to places that it shouldnāt have gone to? Computer backspaced that stuff until it was gone and read āGerard and Sonicā. There were no buttons pressed. Spotify changed to let me know that the spirit of Cactus was there. Stuff flew off shelves a few times, and there was even a time when my Floragato figure was clearly knocked down by a force. It wouldnāt stand up, even though it shouldnāt have and now doesnāt have issues doing so. Stuff would get typed into the searchbar at the bottom of my screen - usually by the cats walking across it, but sometimes not! And it would always result in messages that were clearly the grandmas or Cactus saying something. At least, I donāt think Morriganās late best friend ever said anything - but he was here for a time. I gave him his Killjoy name, Easygoing Lout, and got him out of purgatory and into heaven by marching in The Black Parade. Why? Because he was, at a time, Morriganās closest companion, and that is a pattern that emerged: one grandma and the closest male companion, for the both of us. While I donāt have a complete picture of the circumstances behind Loutās death, Cactus laid down his life so that he could help me save the world. My grandmother did the same in a roundabout way - Iām unsure if more could have been done to stop her from dying of cancer but, had she not let herself die, we might not have had the money and drive to get my eyebrow checked out exactly one year later. Their sacrifices will not be in vain, and since Cactusā body isnāt dead, itās possible I can bring him back or fuse him with Nova. Weāll see what ends up happening! His version of āHow I Disappearā really sounded like he wants to come back. But, all four of them came to me from the afterlife in order to help.
How do I know that? Each one comes with a My Chem song:
And of course, the dead are vague and you have to know how to interpret. The grandmas, naturally, chose the most religious of My Chemās songs, as they were devoutly religious in life, and wanted me to return to being so.
But something I havenāt told yāall is that Iām not just fighting the golden buffalo to save our skins. Iām fighting to prevent World War III, aka the end of the world. Thatās why Cactus chose the song about that precise thing, and why Loutās song says āSay a prayer for California.ā You all do know which state the hyena is from, right? The last time we had a world war, Hitler came incredibly close to either conquering or ending it. What do you think would happen nowadays, with our nukes being much more advanced? The only enemies the golden buffalo hasnāt cozied up to much are the jade snake and the facehugger, aka the two that arenāt currently leaders of a country. Well, the silver wildebeest isnāt, but still. What happens if the golden buffalo assumes the throne and he is cozied up to the silver wildebeest, the red snake, snow miser, and heat miser? They are all extremely powerful, with huge egos. Whether they attempt to band together or, more likely, they war among each other⦠Yeah, take a wild guess where that leaves us. Itās something I realized while rewatching season 2 of the show Pharaoh Way wrote: Umbrella Academy. In it, preventing the assassination of JFK leads to an apocalypse, which lead to me thinking about the arms of today.
The good news? Ya boi used to spend every birthday wish wishing for world peace. Ya boi also used to joke about voting for the cat party, mainly because of my bigoted family, and now weāre seeing the absolute rise of childless cat ladies! āWeāve only got one chance to put this at an endā says Gerard Way, and this is it. Cutting them off now via the ascension of the hyena to the throne will mean their supporters, who trend elderly, will decrease in numbers, particularly if her reign lasts eight years, which I hope it does. Weāll finally have a head start and not have to spend so much of the reign cleaning up elephant droppings.
I chose the hyena, by the way. It was something that had already been kicking around in my brain for a bit, when my mom talked about not liking Jack Frost due to how uncomfortably close he gets to children. I agree, and obviously I also recognize how frustrating it is that she refuses to acknowledge that the golden buffalo does it to a worse extent. But it made me realize my gut feeling of not liking either was right, and we needed the hyena. Jack Frost loses to the golden buffalo, but the hyena has a very good shot.āļø<š„<š Purrhaps my biggest example of seeing paths and choosing one, nya ::3 My powers, of course, are strengthened by music, and I noticed immediately that the blue cat likes to waltz! I read that he was a Swiftie a couple months back, and now that has come full circle!
As the king of death, I am essentially focusing my efforts on saving millions, if not billions of people. Being the king of death doesnāt mean youāre supposed to make people die. It means you try your damnedest to save them!
Anyway, I also have some weather-controlling capabilities. Ironic, really, thinking back to the time the golden buffalo altered a map with a sharpie, insisting that a tornado would instead follow that course. Having noticed that a hurricane shared my name, I decided to test my theory. The result? It reduced from a category 1 to a tropical storm to a tropical depression. Weatherman said less damage would be caused if it sped up? I focused and listened to Sonic music. It sped up. A need for dry heat? Chemo, a couple of incense stix, and half a cigarette later, I was met with the news that heat had filtered through it. Was also met with my temperature increasing drastically and getting very nauseous, though, so thatās not a DIY spell Iāll be attempting alone again.
I am also capable of time travel - thatās what seeing paths is. I am able to see and hear through time. Thatās essentially what all this has been. The science and philosophy behind it is rather complicated - but Iāve got all the necessary components. The artifact - made from metal and typically associated with religious imagery⦠what better place than a hospital, with the tranq they shot into me having caused a wound that stung and the scar remains. In terms of sending it back through a black hole, lately I have wondered whether that is a necessary component, as people have postulated that Roberta Sparrow is a time traveler who is operating on a much longer timeline than Donnie Darko is. Even still, however, I am not worried, as I take medical needles on a pretty consistent basis due to my medical issues. It is not out of the realm of possibility that I essentially have an infinite supply of artifacts. The manipulated dead, well we just went over that. The manipulated living, well just look at how all the living people have given me helpful clues. My friend messages me out of nowhere a month or so ago, and now I come to realize he can help me with Lovecraftian mythos.
Potals? Openable. Liquid Spears? Theyāre a little dangerous if you donāt have good control over your heart, because they feel like Sonic spindashing against it. The full source for everything is
here. I have also befriended Thoth, a time-traveling demon >
_<
Anyway, thatās probably not all of my powers, but itās what Iām capable of! Funny, that those in power have no idea who I am other than my name being on their little list. They should fear me, but I operate from the shadows. I am teaming up with God to cause another great flood, only this time, with pinpoint accuracy. It will roll out slowly, Iām sure, but it is
already underway (Trigger warning: weāre dealing with Moloch here, the things these two have said and done is not easy to read about.) Donāt forget that the š rainbow š is Godās promise that she wonāt wipe us out again, but that doesnāt mean we canāt do it symbolically ::3 Fittingly, Apollo is a name that comes up frequently towards the beginning of the book of Revelation. Remember, stow any fears you may have. We are working in service of non-violence and peace, nya >
_<
Being the king of death is also quite fitting. My childhood plush of choice was
a skeleton. When I was 18, I was turned to such darkness by the world that I strongly considered a terrible path. Before I ever hurt anybody, however, I searched my soul and realized I wanted to choose good. After all, the best time to stop and change your ways is before youāve even started at all. I dealt with my violent tendencies instead by continuing my love for horror, true crime, and would discover creepypasta. My reward is, obviously, massive, as I am an innocent and free purrson, now well-studied in the darker sides of media, which I can use to my advantage! My favourite, most powerful month is even yet to come!
Species: Anthro cat, nya nya!
Most accurate depictions of Dagda in popular culture:
SMT, fan SMT render that made me realize I resemble my childhood plush with the green eyes and orange hair, Joker from Persona 5, Ariane from Signalis, Donnie Darko, Frisk from Undertale, Aladdin, Kovu from The Lion King 2, Kion from The Lion Guard, Link from Ocarina of Time, Majoraās Mask, and Twilight Princess, Sonic, Shilo from Repo! the Genetic Opera, The Cat from The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys: California, Killmonger from Black Panther, PokĆ©mon #197: Umbreon
My songs: