@Lunarmoon21
I’m sorry that you feel so bad. It’s really not good for you, and really won’t help your friend.
Based on some of your past posts may I please suggest that you check out
Keshet? They may be able to help you
support your friend and feel better about their transition.
Everyone’s journey is unique - both your’s and your friend’s. And friendships are so very important to our own self-esteem and health.
The kind of transition your friend is going through can take years, and may be difficult for you both.
But friendships are stronger than gender. And even if someone looks differently on the outside, the person on the inside - the mind, personality, sense of humor and joy in life - that’s the same person, just expressing themselves in a new way.
I hope you’ll find a way to reawaken whatever it was that caused you to be attracted to your friend in the first place, and will be able to get through this in a way that grows your own love of life and of others, and makes your friendship one that will continue to grow for years to come.