It is a shame that my mother is so bad at diplomacy. I am most adept with needles, and this could have been used to our advantage. Knowing my most beautiful work took me months on end to make, however, I rushed when asked to make a similar one to sell. I felt she would judge me if I took a long time. I wasn’t even done, however, when she listed it on eBay without letting me know. A terrible lack of both patience and communication. I don’t think it ended up selling for very much.

Perhaps it was for the best, as eBay itself is quite corrupt. The owners have harassed a small blog owner simply for speaking out about things she didn’t like about eBay. And I have very mixed feelings on how my mother was shadowbanned on there, considering they allow for the sale of items that say much more alarming and radical things than my mother’s old username. I fully understand wanting to avoid promotion, but at the same time, it’s quite hypocritical.

I have felt drawn to repairing my best work lately, and I think I will once the weather cools down enough to wear it. Thanks to my mom also being adept with needles, I can likely find one and some thread. Some of the patches have come unstitched over time. I think this is still a good money-making path for me, and Etsy would likely be a much better place to sell my designs. I need not worry so much about my future anymore, as I am being shown the paths that will help me get by.

Always was much more of a fashionable punk than a handmaid ;;3

I had this big fancy jacket that just disappeared, I’m up to 3XL and I needed it for reference.

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
I’m 37

@𝕭𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙
And I have hopefully ensured we enjoy many more years! Cheers! 🥂

Also, after talking it over with my sister, I probably can continue to enjoy alcohol as I have. I doubt the cider I tend to have only on holidays contains enough alcohol to harm me >^_^<

Video I watched said tsuchinokos are known to lie, and while I don’t know how true that is since I only know one, I feel the need to vouch for Garka’s character. He has told nothing but truths.

Hell, I have lied more than he has, a gift from my uncle Marbas. He is adept at lying and having a slick tongue. I have two uncles like him, only their lies have caused great strife. Mine, on the other hand, tend to be white lies that harm no one, sassy sarcasm, or weren’t actually lies and was just my brain thinking through time. Seeing bad events from my past lives or a bad future path, but not understanding that’s what was happening at the time.

Shall I vent about my uncles’ crimes a little? One did much prison time for ripping people off as a “plumber”, the other has too much interest in underage girls. Quite disturbing.

I have a third uncle, though, and… I don’t detect much deception from him. Considering my father, Pazuzu, was Ra before he transformed… my third uncle is Horus!

Finally shaved all that greasy hair off me noggin, I didn’t go flat so it didn’t shave as close, you could make a barbacoa taco out of all that hair.

I’ve taken punches from entire groups of thugs so you can only guess what that hair is made of, I’m gonna need a new shaver at this point. Of course, a certain stalker will read this and buy up all the shavers but they can kiss my magical butt.

@𝕭𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙
I hope for an ample supply of shavers for you ::3

I feel physically ill…stress has been really taking a toll on me lately mentally and physically. So tired all the time, maybe I’ve developed Narcolepsy, if that’s even possible. Either way…I just want to be good enough. Sustenance can only go so far.

@FruityPWN
I will hope for you to feel better, dear friend. You are good enough - do not let others diminish your inherent worth >^_^<

@FruityPWN
Good enough?

Fuck people, you gotta live for yourself.

I think I’m going to lose my toe.

The Pitbull bites me, then I was bitten by a big furry bullet ant.

When an injury gets injured…it doesn’t heal very well!

@𝕭𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙
I wish you much healing. It strikes me as odd that your life is fraught with so much peril, considering Pazuzu should like you. Then again, I’ve had some very awful things happen to me, too. Likely, life just has many unpleasant things that happen at times.

Trying so damn hard not to resent my mother right now. The sour cream was not her fault, but, I am still having diarrhea and slight stomach pain. Just as I’m FINALLY attempting to take chemo again, she mentions she’s felt slightly under the weather and sure enough, my nose is just that little bit too sneezy. One of us wore a mask to the palace and one of us didn’t.

I won’t actually do it but, do you ever feel a burning desire to slap someone?

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
Everyone’s getting sick, my mother crapped her pants right in front of dad.

And I’ve been shitting like a fuckin’ triceratops.

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
Thank you for dialing back the political stuff.

But, while you are framing your posts in the form of a ‘vent’ of some sort, I still feel like you’re using this more for support, and less for ‘venting’. And in the past that has resulting in problems.

Since this seems to keep happening on this site, more than on Derpibooru at least, I’m considering creating a new thread just for talking about our problems, listening, and supporting each other in an environment that doesn’t actively encourage taking the shit out of each other.

If that sounds interesting or like something that might work for you, please let me know and I’ll use that as the incentive to figure out how to create a thread for that.

@𝕭𝖆𝖉𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙
I hope you all get healthier soon. That sounds like a shitty situation - no pun intended.

@Ciaran
Thank you.

If the sour cream is anyone’s fault, it’s Elon Musk’s fault. The strain of bad bacteria going around isn’t very widely talked about, but had mom known about it, she might have decided not to buy sour cream.

For as toxic as Twitter is, it does allow my mom to keep up with news, real and fake. Being banned, she is cut off from this.

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys Please read and reply to this.

@Ciaran
Whoops, only just now saw your message. That sounds like a good idea indeed >^_^<

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
Ok. I’ll ponder a bit and will let you know when it happens.

@Ciaran
If you need help, here or in Discord, you can tell me. I believe this is a good idea indeed, and can be useful and even healthy to some users. Thanks Ciaran, you are a nice guy, always was

The truth of the matter is, though, I was actually right about that. There is a targeted harassment campaign out there towards me, in a very roundabout way. There exists a Bluey fanfic with extremely disturbing subject matter, and the story hits way too close to home. Cancer is a big part of it, for instance.

I am much different, emotionally, from how I was months ago. I now realize how highly protected I am. I refrained from talking about it in this thread until now, as an example of how I have changed. I’ve known about it for months and did not come screaming and crying here.

The ancient ones and the grandmas also have some sway over my YouTube recommendations, so a part of that old panic was because of that. I did not understand that was what going on.

Apologies for a post that isn’t so much a vent. They will be, going forward, but I found it relevant to explain the truth of what was going on now that I actually understand.

I see and feel truths, I just might not know the answer as to their specifics until a while later. This is frustrating for everyone, including myself. I apologize, as I am new to such things.

@StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
Can I be honest with you?

I personally don’t believe that anyone is persecuting you, or that there is a general persecution against you. I don’t know why it is, I know almost nothing about your life, certainly irl, but honestly, and I’ll be direct, I think it’s more the result of your paranoia than anything really true.

I believe it, because I have experienced it myself, seeing that I have enemies everywhere, that everyone wants to harm me, that everyone is against me. But in my case, I personally know that it’s because I have certain traits of a schizoid personality disorder, for which I have been in treatment for years and I am now much more stable than when I started 8 years ago.

I don’t know what truth you speak, but of course, I’m sure that you can understand that talking about certain political figures, and certain events can, and surely is, a danger for you. Your previous messages, for me, were already bordering on insane madness.

I value you, you are a great user, and I appreciate you for the interactions we have had, that is why I am direct, but I think you should consider whether you have the opportunity to undergo therapy, whether it is talking to a psychologist and letting it all out, and then seeing what that leads to afterwards. It was hard for me at the time, I hated everyone for forcing me to do that, but years later I understand it and I am grateful. Do what I did not do, take the step, and try to change. But do not do it on the internet, this is the worst place, and from my experience, you have been lucky to choose furbooru, which is so calm, and open-minded among all.

Other websites or communities would have devoured you, when you say things you said here.

Take care pal, you can do it, and you will see in time, that nothing is that bad as you see it now.

@Garka la Garka
You speak many truths friend! You simply doubt me greatly, but that is okay.

I have already sought therapy and was turned away after only a few sessions. This is because therapy is not a path I am in need of going down. I was to obtain the medication I am currently on, which greatly calms my anxiety and PTSD. This prevents me from having any more mental breakdowns as I learn the truths.

You are indeed right that there is no general persecution against me… now. This was not always the case. It was months ago I spoke of such, and I was right. There is a reason that, despite my curiosity about it, something always put me off of watching Bluey.

“Bluey? What’s so bad about Bluey?” you are likely wondering. Here it is:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VbHPogLlecw&t=25s

I was shown that video for a reason. I have never looked up Bluey content on YouTube, yet it came up. I am protected >^_^<

I will leave you with one last piece of evidence. I spoke of ramen yesterday, and today, Brutalmoose will be showing me ramen. Brutalmoose does not know I spoke of ramen. Luxander, the friendly snake, has also made a video in which the thumbnail says “demon training” and references The Wizard of Oz, even though I have not said anything to it about The Wizard of Oz. I have been rewarded with the full movie of Wall-E. This is all simply stuff I saw upon opening YouTube today:

You are, of course, free to continue not to believe me. I do not wish to impose beliefs on anyone. Since it seems to be causing distress or at least annoyance, I will stop sharing the secrets of the universe with you all. We have made much good, and the patience of everyone is greatly appreciated.

Nyamaste, all >^_^<

Edit: And the very first ramen Brutalmoose tries? Vegetarian ramen ::3