FruityPWN 
Fruitiest of PWN
I' am alive, but not living. I can't take this anymore. My quality of life is complete shit and there's nobody around or reason for me to continue on any longer than I have to. I feel like I go through the motions of living an everyday life, but for what, an ounce of joy? A slither of happiness? Nothing in my life is worthwhile. I have lost myself in the bullshit that surrounds me all the time, a toxicity that doesn't let up...I've lost that light, or spark if you will, to keep going. I just feel like there's nothing worth staying alive for, due to the fact that life likes to take my trust and crush it into little, tiny pieces. It feels like my life has ended at such a young age, but I'm still alive. Does that make sense? Why is it such a bad thing to want to die? If it were possible I would gladly give up my life for somebody who is far less fortunate than me and have them make the most of it and make a difference in the world. I feel like I was destined to suffer, like I am being punished and now I am a disgrace, forever to be punished for something I did. I always go to bed, not wanting to sleep, but not wanting to wake up...I do not want to die, but not exist...does that mean that I am selfish? Perhaps, but...I have no drive to keep going anymore, since everything is the same. I have no purpose, no love, no friends, no family...heck, I don't even think I have money or even a life. Not that I deserve the life I have, anyways, which I don't. I don't know what I'll do. I am alive, but not living.