Vent Thread

StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
And like, it’s not only me I feel for. Idk how much of this side to them had been exposed previously - but if it hadn’t, it’s gonna be a rude awakening to other people as well. And that’s probably gonna be a little painful. But it’s not my fault - if they had just actually listened to the things I was saying, and actually argued in good faith rather than launching a pre-selected set of videos at me, I wouldn’t have reacted as strongly as I did. They even seemed unaware of what was actually in them.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
(Sorry, lotsa thoughts, tired af but sleep doesn’t want to happen)
There’s a power imbalance at play here, I noticed that person didn’t take the time to check out the stuff I linked about what a Killjoy is, but demanded I watch all the videos they linked. It’s one thing to recommend stuff, it’s another thing to heatedly demand that I watch your crap. Don’t make me listen to you if you’re not gonna listen to me.
Hopefully, I can reach some sort of peaceful state with this person. The more I think about this, the more 🚩it gets. Which of course makes me worry about how they’re currently treating others.
Something’s probably wrong here. But they at least seem like their heart is in a good place, and are hopefully not beyond redemption.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
Also, the entire thing started because I said I don’t eat a vegan diet, and recommended that anyone who does make sure they get their vitamin levels monitored, if possible. That’s not anti-vegan. I’m not anti-vegan. Did they think I am merely because I said that?
But they got all offended and turned it into this big thing.
Well, I was about to say I learned nothing from it, because none of what they whined about wasn’t stuff I didn’t already know, but I actually did learn something valuable: they are very easily offended. Too easily offended. I don’t like the parallels my mind is currently drawing to my abusive ex.
They say they do shadow work, which is when you deal with your shadow self, basically overcome your negative aspects and heal from your trauma. Yet, our few interactions have mostly been them coming at me with this intense attitude, highly critical of the stuff I post. I’m torn between whether they’re manipulative or just someone with a ton of unresolved trauma, and I don’t like how the whole vegan thing has me leaning toward the former. It’s supposed to be a non-hierarchical group, yet they went full authoritarian on me. Not good.
Writing about this here is my process. I don’t do it with the intent to attack or anything. Note that I have named zero names. Writing here lets me let off the steam about it, and I’m trying to figure out what’s going on with them. If this is going to be some “leader” of our group, I don’t like what I’ve seen of them thus far. They’ve come at me in increasingly agitated states, rather than approach with calmness and clarity. It’s a very limited perspective on them, I’m sure, but it doesn’t bode well.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
They seem so concerned with consent… and it’s got me wondering, has anything bad actually happened to them? Or are they just using that as a tool to control people.
I mean, it can be both. It’s just, ya know, I’m an actual victim of that kind of stuff and when you throw consent around that much, I can’t help but wonder. And maybe I wouldn’t, were it not for them linking all those videos promoting veganism, claiming they’re trying to save my life, and it’s like… the whole thing felt so fearmongery. It feels like a pattern of control through fear is emerging.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
They got angry at me because I mentioned veganism without talking about “the victims”, aka animals. Of course I care about animals, but let’s center this on a my-consent perspective: they basically tried to shame me into doing something I do not consent to. See it for what it really is.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
That does it. I’m still mad. I’m not taking this lying down, because this is not okay. I picture us on our little hippie moon base, and I am shamed and starved to death. That’s no better for me than other oppressive systems - it may even be worse. Christ, at least my mom cares about my medical needs! This is someone who blatantly has more privilege than I do, trying to use their privilege against me. They need to either stop and do a ton of shadow work to become a good leader, or they shouldn’t be leading us at all. I was told there wasn’t supposed to be hierarchy here!
Do they even know what it means to be a punk? Because I do. I grew up.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
On a more positive but still annoyed note - god I miss playing Smash Ultimate. I think my Switch is done for good - a small amount of cat pee was all it took to ruin the charging port. I guess today is just kind of a bad day for me. I’m of course still not feeling great after what happened. Starting to feel really lonely as night sets in, too. I’ve spent so long alone and in pain. At least I love myself now.
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StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys
Deletion reason: Rule #6 - Please do not bring off site drama like this here. This is not the right place, or site, for advertising these kinds of things.
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
I don’t know what, but something needs to be done about them. I really hope I won’t be seen as toxic for all I’ve said and done. I really hope people will listen to me and actually make a positive change there, somehow. Please, recognize how not okay the way they treated me was.
ChickPea

I’m starting to wonder will god punish us for our sins, we have people like Jack Doherty, Mr. Beast and the others, those who are example of evil, I imagine Noah and his Ark floating on flooded earth.
Azlikekitty
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Espeon The Mama Cat
Well I have enough for the Pokémon group drama leaked about the allegations of Thyplosion, Slanking, Octoling and Rapidash for the weird story they just found just like P.Diddy version of cartoons
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
Really wish my whole awakening to powers thing hadn’t been so confusing and frustrating for everyone involved, including myself. Like, it’s cool I guess, that I can hear into alternate timelines, but all that did was confuse everyone a few months back when I was doing that.
Sigh… oh well, it’ll all have been worth it to stop the thing that seriously needs to be stopped. Because, yeah, it’s not out of loneliness that I began working with demons and deities. It’s to stop the project, and I only just realized I never made that clear.
I’m sorry for everything, everyone 💚🐈
StrangeKittenOfTheFabulousKilljoys

Meow meow :3
I forgot my head used to explode! Hasn’t happened for years now. For anyone who doesn’t know, it’s a harmless yet terrifying condition where you hear a realistic explosion, but it’s in your head and isn’t actually happening irl. I remember I once heard a super-realistic one right outside my room, asked my mom about it later, and she didn’t hear it, which is what lead to me researching the topic.
I read that it can be caused by PTSD. Interestingly, I do have PTSD, but not from war which is what you’d expect exploding head syndrome to come from, so I guess it can come from any form of PTSD. The fact that it’s been so long since it’s happened to me is probably a positive sign on my healing-from-PTSD journey, nya >^_^<
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